YEAH! Who says John can’t get stoned?

And call girls he hasn’t talked to in like a five years, or watch adult swim?

I love John Mayer and his huge cock. That’s what I’ve heard, you know, that’s why Jennifer always goes back to him. he can strum a va-j-j the same way he can strum her G spot.

Stoners love John’s music almost as much as we love Jack Johnson, something about the melancholy tune or the fact that I can sing a long even after hitting the bong, helps too.

I LOVE IT!

I wanted to screw Ronnie ever since I saw him become runner up on Make Me A Supermodel, and hearing him talk about kissing his first boyfriend under the stars is toner storytelling at it’s best. Who knew his 78 year old grandmother would be the hero of his story?

Via: Queerty

Finally we can all enter The Wizarding Hole Of Whorry Potter!

This is a must see, although they’re not really wearing Gryfindor’s signature colors and I don’t remember Ronald Wesley being black but whatever.

It has floating cocks in the preview, and no one, not even Pat Buchanan could resist a magical floating black cock. They’re magically delicious.

Read on….

Put that cock shaped bong and listen, I’m just going to get this out of the way first, you are NOT on the list. The only list you are on is the, “do not take checks” list at your local 7-Eleven. Was that carton of Parliments worth it? Fuck yes. So here is a list from coedmagazine.com. regarding the most successful stoners around.

We need better role models than Shaggy from Scooby-Doo. Although I am a huge fucking stoner fan of Scooby-Doo, I’d rather my hazy intellect not be compared to a dogs. Doggy style, that’s another story.

Anyways, it’s time to feel inadequate and under accomplished. Look at what all the other stoners are doing. Have you even washed your balls today? Give em’ a sniff.

Sir Richard Branson

While the ‘Sir’ in front of this guy’s name puts him in some very elite company, it doesn’t automatically get him on this list. What does earn him a spot is the fact that he’s the 236th richest person in the world, founder of the Virgin empire, which encompasses everything from airlines to record stores to cell phones, and made his entire multi-billion dollar fortune from absolutely nothing. Not only does this man smoke weed, he gets high with his 21-year-old son. He has publicly stated that there’s nothing wrong with smoking pot, has petitioned for the legalization of pot, and even said that if it were legal, he’d sell it.

Montel Williams

The talk show prince discovered pot late in life, and for good reason. Back in 1999 he was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis, and couldn’t find anything to suppress his symptoms. He tried all sorts of pain killers; none worked, and all had horrible side effects. So he decided to try medical marijuana (same thing as regular marijuana, FYI) and it worked wonders for him! Years later, he is one of MS’s most recognizable faces, one of medical marijuana’s staunchest defenders, and even though he’s baked all the time, still managed to host his own talk show until 2008, when it was unfortunately canceled. Well, at least he’s still got his weed.

See the rest of the list HERE.

UPDATE: Shame on A&E We thought they were smarter than airing a salacious pot-umentary that could’ve been written in the Regan Era, and blamed medicinal marijuana for all of Humboldt’s booming economy problems. Because it was booming with people’s money they didn’t want. Well straight couples moved into my precious gay ghetto of Weho and you don’t see me crying about the rent going up and the neighborhood changing.
Don’t watch this dated viewpoint, which mumbles the benefits of medicinal marijuana under it’s breath, while it scares it’s viewers into believing the drug creates problems for landlords renting to people and big business coming to town.

I was so pissed I WROTE IN AND I NEVER WRITE IN TO NETWORKS!

We all know Intervention’s a big hit for A&E but try demonizing a drug the President agrees is a treat at LEAST!

In their new documentary Intervention: Pot City, USA which airs tonight at 9PM Pacific on A&E they follow the Humboldt County Drug Task Force as they go after over 1000 illegal home grows.

If we want legal marijuana state wide part of the process is weeding out the bad seeds and Mexican drug lords operating in Cali and make it legit by taxing our businesses. Too bad they don’t focus on gang activity just massive grows that damage rental properties.

A lot of people think that Humboldt County in northern California is an American paradise. Small towns in the county like Arcata look like they’ve been plucked right out of a Norman Rockwell painting. But the town has a dirty little secret–law enforcement officials say that over 1,000 homes there may be growing marijuana illegally. Capt. Mark Chapman and the Humboldt County Drug Task Force are determined to take back the town, house by house. Our cameras follow as they make busts and fly over forestlands searching for hidden marijuana groves.

Go A&E, let’s hope they handle the patient and benefits aspect and it’s not just Dog, The Pot Hunter. Oh wait it was WORSE!

Really gay guys kissing doesn’t turn me on but Adam does. Eww his boyfriend leaning in all aggressive like means he’s 100% a BOSSY BOTTOM.

Do me this way Adam, sing to me too, move your leg, other hand, go harder…you know. Like me during sex!

Here are the butt pirates, who look like Gay Stoners to me, kissing for the cameras outside a 7-11. I’m kind of confused though because he’s doing this provocative spread in Details where he’s all over a girl, probably to confuse the American public. Here’s one of the pics, where he’s holding her boob like an ass. You can’t put your finger in a boob ADAM!

Photo Via: Allie Is Wired

1 HIT – Daily Dick To Smoke Dubs To

2 HIT – The Wall Street Journal Looks At Medical Marijuana’s Booming Industry

3 HIT – Stoner Boner: Another Hot House 3some

4- “Prince Of Pot” Charlie Lynch Sentenced To A Year Behind Bars For Medicinal MJ

Love those perfectly manicured nails in addition to that perfectly manicured bud, Gay Mexi-Stoner. He sent this in via my email and I’m loving his big nugget. Looks like a thick one.The bud. Not him.

PURE IMAGINATION BY MAROON 5 – You gotta love a new take on an old classic. I’m 10 again and Maroon 5 is here!

You can’t be a fat stoner because then you’re a stereotype, and I’m already stereotypically gay so I work out constantly. Mostly from my home with that p90X system of DVDs but Ellen found me a way to jack off with my workout buddies without it being gay.

Just don’t drop the bell unless you’re putting it down to really masturbate now!

If you get really high
And stare at the outline of his penis head,
It’ s like
It pops out at you!!
The cross makes it
Even more wrong

I can trace it, right there.
With my finger.
Up and down.
Wait that’s my tongue.

It’s ok, I have computer cleaner
I was just huffing it.
And ‘Walking On Sunshine’ like Allison
From Intervention

Looks like he’s wide open to me and no girls will sleep with him now so it’s time he switched teams. Fists are for butts not for faces silly rapper.

More of cutie Chris who can Donkey Punch me anytime but not really punch me. I have rules and safety words, because I’m a safety girl!

A True Stoner Classic to laugh at even though it makes me cry real tears too. Given to us by the geniuses over at Intervention. What do you mean this is exploitive television? This is entertainment.

We all know marijuana is the best and safest drug in the world but Allison here never got the memo and likes to huff keyboard cleaner instead. Allison you high on chemicals giiiiiiirl!

I’m an herbivore myself, and localvore.

Conan just isn’t getting the ratings he deserves. When I’m alone at night and I’m touching myself while I watch late night TV, I always look forward to Conan and some Indica kush to lull me to my magical dreamland of crystal chandeliers and angel boy slaves.

So you can imagine how happy I got when Jaime Foxx confirmed it was his python, and there really is no other name for that BEAST of NATURE, that mezmerized me online. I must see it AGAIN.

Oh let’s SHOTGUN! Shotgun in my mouth!

(That never really works but I seduce gay stoners with it all the time. Really Dumb loaded straight dudes at 4am too. )

It was a terrific Tuesday Morning when I found Hottie Happy Trail Stoner who sent in his tat-alicious body pics\ for us all to rub our bongs too. Look he can do a push up, and his side says hope. As in I hope I get to redecorate his house when I go over to do him.

Crunch those Abs Gay Stoner!

Send in your Hotties Smoking Potties to : joint@gaystoners.com

High,
My name is Jenna Mystique and I’ve been following your blog for a while now and I LOVE IT!! Its really funny and so refreshing to see. I have to admit, after I heard the name gaystoners.com I was almost completely sold. I’m actually in a drag group called THE BOOM BOOM DOLLS based out of Los Angeles. Its not your typical drag act, our four characters are pretty extreme and completely hysterical. My character is a HUGE STONER and is always talking about weed and making jokes about it. We just finished our first short film and were wondering if you’d watch it and if you liked it could possibly post something about it on your wonderful blog since its gay and highlights weed. I guarantee you won’t regret it. I’ve also included a funny pic of myself toking when I was blonde for your hottie smoking pot. Any help would be GREATLY APPRECIATED and we can include a link to your blog on ours. Thank you so much.

Well I’m pretty stoned and this movie really sucks a dildo soooooo it’s worth a view.

Thanks for the mail Jenna, and now it’s time for everyone else to take a hit and watch these bitch whores in action. I know like ten straight guys who sleep with the blonde. Everyone really except the burnette…she’d just get to suck them off.

DARLEEEEENNE Get your girlfriend’s ASS IN HERE!

Sara Gilbert and Allison Adler have gone from fur traders to pumpkin traders at our local celebrity flaunt you kids/pumpkin patch. Parade around your gaybies proudly Sara because your girlfriend is Lipstick Lesbian hot. (If you don’t know your gay-cabulary that means she’s attractive and you’re probably reading the wrong website)

SEE HERE HAPPY FAMILY & HOT PIECE OF FUR HERE!

Or you can stare at other famous people I can’t name picking out pumpkins for their maids to carve HERE

I totes made my manscera run when I watched this.

Via: Boy Culture

Today is quite possibly the best Monday of my life! Not only did I get some fag-erific news about work but I also took the day off to cut my precious plants down and start the drying process. It smells dank-a-licious in my room, so much that I think I’m getting my neighbors high off the fumes. HOW WONDERFUL!

Here are some Harvest time tips:

-Give the plants 24 hours of darkness before cutting the stem at the bottom
- Hang plants upside down and manicure off all the leaves, saving them in a brown paper bag to make butter with.
- Dry precious for one week MINIMUM. I know you want to smoke my shit…I do too but we have to be patient. Kind of like with anal sex….you gotta be gentle at first. Most books recommend two weeks + cuz the longer the manicured buds cure the better.
-Put a piece of glass or plastic down because THC crystals will fall off and you can collect them.
- Once the stem SNAPS and doesn’t bend anymore YOUR BUDS ARE READY.

I made my friend come over and help me manicure them. He’s a cute straight guy who dates my BFF Fruit Fly. I should have made him get in his undies so I knew he didn’t steal any but that would’ve been weird cuz we’re like brothers.

A bud fell off last week and I’ve been drying it but it’s still not ready. So I had to just go buy some today. Sucksies. I just can’t believe my first try produced such amazing results. All four plants, Little Engine, Dr. Evil’s Liquid Hot Magma, Adam’s Nectar, and uh….uh..I forgot the last one because I never printed their name tags. But anyways they all look like two ounces.

Don’t be jealous girl, you can do this too. Or you come over and smoke mine. Just get in your undies first.

I don’t know where this picture is from but I’m super stoned so it looks like Clinton’s getting some.

CLINTON: I said, you know, I realized that I was over 60 years old, I grew up at a different time, and I was hung up about the word.
I had all these gay friends, I had all these gay couple friends, and I was hung up about it. And I decided I was wrong.

That our society has an interest in coherence and strength and commitment and mutually reinforcing loyalties, then if gay couples want to call their union marriage and a state agrees, and several have now, or a religious body will sanction it, and I don’t think a state should be able to stop a religious body from saying it, I don’t think the rest of us should get in the way of it.

I think it’s a good thing not a bad thing. And I just realized that, I was, probably for, maybe just because of my age and the way I’ve grown up, I was wrong about that. I just had too many gay friends. I saw their relationships. I just decided I couldn’t, I had an untenable position.

He’s already getting soundtrack work and the butt pirate hasn’t even released a fucking album yet!

Is this some kind of cruel joke? Oh the world’s ending so lets get a gay to sing our theme song. Well I don’t care if I’m going to hell because at least I’ll know everybody there.

I’m disgusted and intrigued! What does an end of the world song sound like by Adam?

I fell in love with this little partied up Boy on that terrible Guys Gone Wild video but the clip of him whipping out his baby arm to attract a female in New Orleans is priceless.

Ladies get ready for a shower not a grower and get your gasp face on.

He’d be good for one night but by the way he grunts I’m guessing he doesn’t have more to offer besides a few primal screams in the night.

When asked about legalizing marijuana on last night’s Jay Leno Show, gay comic Wanda Sykes said,

“That’s nuts. I’m against it. You ever know a pot smoker that keeps a to-do list? You’re not going to improve the economy or productivity.”

And what exactly will? “If Schwarzenegger wants to spark productivity and make some money, cocaine baby,” Sykes joked. “You’ll have people working 48 hour shifts. It will be good for the environment – people will be running to work.”

THIS IS INSANE! A gay black comedian AGAINST weed?! Too bad when I bumped into Wanda in LA a year ago I was as high as Charlie Sheen during the prostitution years!!!

Good thing her HBO special, and gay life have turned her new HBO comedy special into a HIT!!

The most amazing gay documentary I’ve seen in years just found me when I was stoned and cruising around HBO on demand. It’s about closeted politicians and the hypocrasy of their voting records and effect on our community. The information is something you never see reported on except of some blog here and there, and the cover ups will leaving your mouth open like a glory hole.

It’s shocking, sad, truthful, and a sign of the times!

I laughed, I cried, I watched it again.

My new goal in life is to meet Barney Frank, who is featured in the film and is the most famous GAY STONER I can think of. He’s also a total genius and I’m going to have to devote some time to the Tao Of Frank. One of the only politicians left that speaks the truth and speaks it well I adored his candor.

YOU MUST SEE THIS DOCUMENTARY…..stoned of course.

What are you still doing here I said GO!

I’ll continue to seek out more info on Barney Frank and his much younger (30 years) man meat!

“I know you’re supposed to tell kids not to do drugs, but, kids, do it! Do weed! Don’t do the other stuff, but weed is good . . . What you want to do is what I did, build a movie empire and, at age 38, smoke it all away.”